50 Shades of... Nothing

I read 50 Shades of Grey by E.L. James about a month or two ago, since the hype for it was crazy, and I was really itching to read a new book. I love reading books because I get so absorbed into the story that I feel like I form a personal and close relationship with the characters, which is probably why I cry in books more often than I do in movies. It's different when you're reading a character's thoughts, feelings, wishes, hopes, and dreams, and feel one with them, than when you simply watch their actions on film. 

After reading 50 Shades of Grey, I was honestly disappointed. I was literally like, "That's it?!" I couldn't believe how poorly it was written, and in cheap taste. To summarize the whole story, (sorry for the spoilers ahead) it's about an innocent girl who falls in love with a powerful and wealthy man, who's into some really sexually weird shit, but is a bit too cowardly to commit to a relationship. They try to work things out, but eventually had to give up on each other. And that's basically it. After putting your time and effort into reading 514 pages, that's all you get. And come on, haven't we heard that story a billion times?

So, what's the hype all about? Sex. Sex with the perfect man who's handsome, strong, well-endowed, and whose name is Christian Grey. The book was crafted in such a way that you'll fall head over heels with him, and how you'd be willing to do unimaginable things just to be with him. It reminds me a lot of Twilight since it started as a fan fiction of it. Both stories revolve around a guy, (they make women look pathetic, btw) but 50 Shades of Grey is sexually ten times crazier. Just imagine handcuffs, beads, leather, fisting,  bondage, and multiply that by a hundred. That's the kind of literature this book is about. Better yet, before it gets really awkward, just watch these two videos by Ellen and 3 old ladies. After watching them, congratulations, you've practically read the whole book.

Ellen reads "50 Shades of Grey"

3 Old Ladies Read "50 Shades of Grey"

Nonetheless, I still understand why people are crazy about it. 50 Shades of Grey, specifically Christian Grey, taps on the inner desires of people, and yanks it out of them. I guess everybody needs that sort of fantasy or escape once in a while, especially maybe housewives who don't get a lot of craziness every now and then (My friend Cla said this book is referred to as "mommy porn" haha). Every girl and woman still dreams of that man who can take her flying. I just think that books like these, or as they call it, erotic novels, are a form of "cheap writing" because there's honestly no real story. The whole time I was reading it, that's what I was looking for. Not once was I excited to take a peep in the next few pages to know what was going to happen next. And no, it did not touch my soul. It was all about sex, sex, and then crazier sex. To me, there should be way more than that in a story. You'd be better off just watching porn. Seriously.

But hey, that's just my opinion.